I really don’t know when my grandmother obtained her wooden spoon. She married my grandfather in 1896 and the house was built in 1900. Cooking was a necessity in those days – nothing like the optional convenience we enjoy today.

I started making bread in my teens and asked my dad if I could have her spoon and breadboard. He agreed and my love of cooking and bread making was born. I never knew my grandmother; even though, I grew up in the house she and my grandfather built and where my dad and cousin George were born. She died in 1937 when my dad was 19, apparently of a sudden heart attack. So, I grew up with her stories and her things, and I felt her practicality and knowledge as a farm wife and mother instilled in my DNA.

After my surgery for a cancerous tumor pressing on my SCM muscle in my neck 12 years ago, I thought my bread making days were over. For those who have never made bread, it can be a very physical exercise with mixing and kneading bread dough with both hands, arms, and shoulders. A weakened left side now makes such maneuvers practically impossible and painful for me, and, especially, repetitive motions. Even typing or cutting up vegetables can leave me with shooting pains in my neck and face. So, finding new ways to do things I have always done has been a challenge and a necessity for me.

When you have a surgery, you aren’t always prepared for the aftermath. The doctors don’t always know the extent of the surgery and how your body will be affected or how much or how fast you will heal. I became permanently disabled from the standard of what a normal person can be expected to do – however, over the years and with help from some very special health professionals in my life, I have learned to do many things a different way without being in long-term, excruciating pain.

I have learned to use tools, such as, a food processor, immersion blender, etc., that make cooking possible again. My husband lifts skillets and does the dishes, and I have found bamboo bowls that are safe for cooking but that are much lighter and easier to manage than my former stainless steel and glass. However, the bread maker just didn’t get it for making sourdough bread. The energy and thoughts of the prepare go into the food – and the love was just missing.

Sourdough bread making is somewhat of an art. I made it years ago; but, with my husband watching his blood sugar and my focus on preventing any further cancer imbalances, we don’t eat much bread or carbohydrates period. I put myself on a strict diet of organic vegetables and vegan nutrition 3 years ago to prepare for another invasive mouth surgery, and then I had to prepare for another invasive surgery a year ago. However, we have since learned the health benefits of the good gut bacteria in organic, whole-grain sourdough. Thus, I embarked on a way to make this bread since buying what I wanted with the required ingredients just was not possible.

I have come to understand that to remain healthy, some of us must be extremely diligent with every bite of food that goes into our mouths and every thought that goes through our heads. To maintain my health, I have to eat organic vegan foods, only having the occasional bit of butter and cheese, and that requires searching out the right ingredients and making these foods myself if I can’t find a suitable prepared food. That’s where my grandmother’s spoon comes in.

I ordered flour and sourdough starter from Sunrise Flour Mill. Some organic flours are too rough for my sensitive mouth – however, theirs is a fine grind and makes a very soft bread. In their instructions, they talked about folding the dough in the last part of the process – so, I found a way to work the dough in the bowl with the wooden spoon and my right hand only. This is where the art of the years of bread making and cooking as well as what my health care mentors taught me about learning to do things a different way come in. I still have to plan how and when I make bread – and it has to be a day when I’m home and not doing any cooking or other physical motions of that type.

I also believe that the years of love and history in my grandmother’s wooden spoon help me to complete this task and other things that are physically challenging. It’s a mindset and a way of approaching life. These last 13 years have been hard on my family with them watching me go through these illnesses and surgeries. I have wanted to do everything I can to heal and remain well. So, I asked God to give me the knowledge to overcome the cancer imbalances so that I could help myself and others – and so I don’t have to see the worry on my husband’s and daughter’s and family’s and friends’ faces. So, God said make bread and I had to have faith that there was a way!

Mark 11:22-24 KJV

And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God. For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.